How I Found Creative Balance In My Life
If you’re anything like me, you have a multitude of interests and creative outlets. You know, those simple activities that bring you joy and set your soul on fire. However, at times it can be overwhelming. I want to draw and paint more portraits, master professional photography, write music and sing, become an interior designer, learn photoshop and graphic design, start a blog, even go to the gym… but wait – I have a full time 9-5 corporate job. How the actual HECK am I going to accomplish all of this?!
For a while, I struggled with creative time management and my regular workload. I could not find the time, the balance, and it killed me with every passing day. Let me just say this – if you are unhappy in your day job, it will be nearly impossible to master this type of balance. And that’s the hard truth. I hated my first job so much that I came home and laid in the fetal position, too unmotivated and depressed to even look for another job. This lasted over a year. So much time wasted, when I could have been pursuing other creative avenues.
My music career is another thing that haunts me to this day. For the last decade, I’ve been writing, recording, and producing my own music. I labeled myself as a songwriter. That’s who I was. That’s what I loved. But after a while, it got way too difficult, technical and expensive. People still ask me to this day, “Why did you stop writing music?” “You need to write more songs!”
I haven’t picked up a guitar in two years. Maybe more, I stopped counting. To be honest, it was extremely difficult for me to let that part of me go. It felt like the songwriter in me died, and I was letting people down. But then one day, I completely changed my mindset. I acknowledged that part of my life, how wonderful it was, what I got out of it, and how fortunate I was to be given such a wildly beautiful talent. And then I let it go. I literally Konmari’ed a hobby!
As soon as I accepted the fact that my music was laid to rest for a while, I thrived. My anxiety lifted. I had so much excitement and enthusiasm to try new things and explore other creative avenues. I stopped putting so much pressure on myself. If I have a list of 5 creative tasks that I want to accomplish, I space them out during the week and try to tackle something new each night. When the week is up but I never made it to those tasks, guess what… that’s okay now! I’ll get to them next week, and it gives me even more to look forward to!
This is where I got mixed up in my own emotions for too many years. That simple switch. Instead of beating myself up daily for not accomplishing every creative aspect of my to-do list, I changed my mindset from failure to opportunity. All pressure falls away when you release control of the outcome and shift your perspective.
One thing in particular that has helped me right my creative vessel was the creation of my interior design Instagram account, @kyliewhitespace. I didn’t know what I was going to do with the account or the direction I wanted to take with it, but it has evolved into something so beautiful and precious to me. It’s become a perfectly crafted collage of all my accomplishments. I have all my content planned out for weeks in advance, and now I’m excited and eager to create! My overwhelming feelings of defeat have turned into: I wonder what I can repurpose at the Thrift Store... Let’s go to the city to shoot new content... What can I do to this dead space in my bedroom to make it more artistic? What about that blank wall over there?
My brain is always moving, always looking for a new creative breakthrough. This was the exact push that I needed, and I have never been happier. And I’m hoping this post is the push you needed, too.